Presented, for your consideration…
A picture of despair: a man, alone, wanders aimlessly through the halls of San Patricio Mall, in search of a cheap memory card for his PS2. All around him, quacks, con artists, and frauds try to push their wares upon him. Yeah, that’s right, it’s Psychic Week again at the local mall.
I tend to avoid the mall during the all-too-frequent ‘psychic weeks’, when the mall is full of makeshift kiosks chock full of all manner of crystals, incense, angel figurines, and anything else that fits the whole ‘New Age’ theme. And no booth is complete without a sign reading ‘Tarot Reading inside!’, unless it’s accompanied by a ‘Aura Photography!’.
I’ll admit, it was tempting to go from booth to booth getting tarot readings at each one and then laughing at how no two ‘psychics’ gave me the same predictions, but, alas, I don’t have the kind of money that would take. Also, I’d rather eat my money rather than give it to these con artists.
Still, I’m proud of myself. Throughout the hour or so I spent at the mall, I was completely able to restrain myself from running down the halls, screaming “FRAUDS!” and “Don’t give these liars your money!”. I wasn’t, howver, able to keep myself from going by each booth and making sure to meet the ‘psychic’s eyes squarely, before making a disgusted face and looking away while rolling my eyes. Yeah, I know, I’m a jerk. But at least I’m not charging you to listen to my unfocused rambling. All of my false predicitons are free.
Also, you will meet a tall, dark, handsome stranger. He will expose his genitals at you, at a socially crippling time.
