TechgnosisWeb Prime

Recently, I realized something: I’ve started using more apps online than I do on my actual computer. Now, I’m not a typical user, far from it. I’m an alpha geek, as it were, so I love trying out stuff ont he bleeding edge. Also, due to the nature of my job, I tend to be constantly jumping from one computer to another. I’ll be working merrily along on one machine, and the next day, or even in a couple of hours, I’ll have switched to another PC in another location. I don’t have a laptop computer (yet), but I still manage to keep my information and documents organized, accesible, and workable, from anywhere that has net access. Without even realizing it, I’ve been using the long-fabled Web Desktop… or at least part of it.

All I need is a computer with Firefox installed… and if they don’t have Firefox, well, I’ve always got Portable Firefox on my trusty USB key. Then, I load up a few key sites, each on it’s own tab:

First, there’s NetVibes. That’s the main site, the one where I link from to the rest of my Web Desktop. Netvibes allows me to keep and view information from most of the sites I visit every day, all in one page, in a nice and flexible interface. RSS feeds for the news and information sites I read are presented each in their own box, and fully readable without having to exit NetVibes itself. Tech news, security alerts, personal sites, I’ve got them all constantly updated and constantly accesible right there.

For those sites that don’t have RSS feeds but which I access regularly, Netvibes has a box where I can keep a list of bookmarks, categorically arranged and easily taggable and searchable, so I have my most often used bookmarks accesible no matter where I am. I can keep up with Flickr photostreams, or search multiple search engines directly from it too. Integrated GMail and POP Mail boxes allow me to quickly scan my incoming email without having to log in to those services.

In addition to all the functionality it already has, NetVibes also plays well with others: Another box lets me view, add, and access files to my free online Box.net storage account. 1 GB of free storage accesible from anywhere online. Sure, the max file size is 10MB, but that’s plenty, and if I ever need more, the commercial Box.net plans are very fairly priced. As for document editing and sharing, the Writely box gives me access to my documents on the Writely online service (recently bought up by Google), where I can view, edit, create, export, and collaborate with others on text documents using a very nice interface. It’s not MS Word, but it’s close enough for the stuff I need to do while on the road, and exports nicely to .doc format.

So, let’s see: so far, we’ve got a Desktop (NetVibes), My Documents (Box.net), WordPad (Writely), My Pictures (Flickr), Outlook (GMail), an RSS Reader (NetVibes again)… Not too shabby. But there’s more!

While GMail handles the messaging aspect of Outlook, the calendaring features are not addressed by any of the services I’ve mentioned so far. Enter Kiko: a sweet online calendaring app, done in AJAX and, if I’m not mistaken, Ruby on Rails (more about RoR in a future post). I can view, edit, add, etc. appointments, manage contacts, send myself and my contacts appointment reminders via email, IM, or mobile phone, all within a really nice, usable interface. I started using Kiko only a few days ago, but it’s quickly growing indispensable.

So that’s the Calendaring and contact management dealt with. What’s left? How about Instant Messaging? Trillian’s great on my regular desktop for handling the multitude of IM accounts I have, but when I’m on the road, it’s not quite as accesible. Enter Meebo: an incredibly slick site that lets me connect to MSN, AOL, Jabber, GTalk, Yahoo, and ICQ, with as many accounts as I want, all with one login, in a natural IM interface. if you haven’t tried it out, I really suggest you do.

So, that’s it, my Web Desktop. NetVibes open in one tab, Kiko in another, Meebo in a third, maybe GMail in a fourth, and this blog in the fifth. Messaging, calendaring, information, documents, all the basic things you need in a desktop, from anywhere, with no need to install anything, and all free. It’s not perfect: none of these online applications is quite as full featured as their traditional desktop equivalents. But they’re more than good enough for me to get my work done on a daily basis on the road. Is the Web Desktop here yet? Maybe it is, and no one’s quite noticed yet.
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Technorati Tags: Box.net, Writely, Flickr, NetVibes, Kiko, Meebo, GMail

Allright, time to move on a bit. I’ve been neglecting my bloggerly duties, and I don’t think Mr. White would approve of that in any case. Besides, it’s not all gloom and doom; there’s been a buttload of cool things lately as well, and I need to get to writing about them before they pass me by. So, keep an eye on this spot over today and the weekend, when I’ll hopefully start posting up about all the cool things that have kept me busy over the past couple of weeks. And, yes, there may be another rat picture or three.

I’ve heard it said that, sometimes, someone comes into your life, unexpectedly, and makes a home there, filling a void that you never even knew you had. That’s the way it was with Mr. White, my dear pet rat, who passed away in my hands last night.

When we first decided to get pet rats, Natalie and I acquired Yuki. As he wasn’t the friendliest of animals, we soon acquired Blue, and, to keep her company, Nezumi. Nezumi, tiny little bundle of hate that she’s always been, turned out to have been pregnant when we got her, and in due course gave us a litter of little ratlets. There were the girls: Maggie, She Who Licks, and She Who Hates. And then there was the one boy: Mr. White. When we found out that he was the only boy, we were dissapointed. We knew we couldn’t safely keep him with the rest of the girls, and we didn’t want to have to deal with another cage just for him. Plus, we didn’t think it would have been fair to him to not get the socialization that the others would get. So we tried to give him away. It seems silly now, but we did. Thankfully, in hindsight, no one took him, so we raised him up ourselves. Looking back on it, I wouldn’t trade a single day that we spent with the little dude for anything.

As they grew, each of the ratlets developed his or her own personality: inquisitive, greedy, friendly, shy… You don’t really understand just how such a tiny animal can have such a huge personality until you see them develop. Each one was as unique as can be, and Mr. White was no exception. As he was alone, unable to bond with the other rats, he, instead, bonded to us. He became an incredibly sweet, gentle, loving pet, who would, every day, gladly pass by fresh food and instead rub up against our hands in search of affection. He could, and would, spend hours on end cuddled up on our laps, begging for scratches behind his ears, or to be bundled up resting against us.

Many of you may have the experience of coming home after a hard day and finding your dog waiting for you at the door, tail wagging, completely and totally overjoyed that you’re home, ready to shower you in unconditional affection. This is not something limited to dogs: Mr. White’s cage was right next to my computer, and every night when I sat down, he would rush up to the corner facing me, looking for ways to get my attention and get me to hold him.

If I’d known how short his time with me would be, I would have held him much more often than I did.

Every day for the past two years, Mr. White’s been there for us, for me. He’s always been my little dude, my co-conspirator, my dawg. And he never asked for anything in return other than to be allowed to stay with me, to be held and loved and to love in return.

3 days ago, this amazing little animal fell ill.

His breathing became labored, and he had begun to have panic attacks as it got harder for him to breathe. We took him to the vet the next morning, and, after running some tests, the doctor told us that Mr. White had a lung infection, and that it was serious. he gave him a shot of antibiotics, and gave us some additional medicine to give him. We did as the doctor asked, and gave him his medicine twice a day, and spent as much time as we could with him, holding him, trying to help him relax and breathe.

Last night, when I got home, I was told that Mr. White had been breathing heavily most of the day, and that he had a few panic attacks. Seeing him scared in his cage, I picked him up and held him close to me, whispering soothing words, trying to give him the comfort he needed… it wasn’t enough. At first, his breathing relaxed, and he settled into the crook of my arm, resting.. but not long after, his breathing become more and more labored, and he would squirm in obvious fear and confusion as he wasn’t getting enough air. I felt him struggling in my hands, I could see the fear in his eyes, the way he would try to leap and get closer and closer to me, looking for help from the person he trusted. Even as he began gasping for breath in my hands, as his eyes became unfocused and his gasping breaths more irregular, and I cried and whispered fiercely that it would be alright, that there was nothing to be afraid of, that he was safe with me, I felt a knife stab and twist in my guts as I knew he was dying in my hands… I told him I loved him, over and over, and I hope those were the last words he heard, before the tiny little flame of his life went out right in my arms.

I don’t remember the next few minutes very clearly.

I know we put his body, when I could finally bear to let go of it, and we wrapped it in a shirt and placed him in a box, while we figured out how to say goodbye. There was no place to bury him in our house anymore, and he deserves better than the meager, shallow grave I could have dug him. We finally found a place that will cremate your pet’s remains, and I managed to keep it together enough to make arrangements for his cremation.

I didn’t sleep very well last night. Neither did Natalie, who loved him every bit as fiercely as I did.

This morning, I woke up, and as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, the sudden memory of last night, the realization that he wouldn’t be there to sniff at my fingers and beg to be scratched as he did every morning, hit me like a punch in the stomach. For a second, I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t cry. If the depth of my grief surprises you, believe me, it surprises me too, but I can’t deny it. I had no time to get ready, no time to prepare for this.. not that I could have ever been prepared to lose my little dude. I picked him up last night intending to comfort him so the medicines would take effect, hoping madly that he was strong, that he would get through this. And in a matter of minutes, he was gone. I’m glad that he was in my hands, being held, being cradled, when he went. I’m glad that the last words and feelings he felt from us were love.

I may not beleive in many things, but love is the one thing that remains, the one thing that lasts, even when life goes away. Love is what remains, eternal.

I took his body to the animal clinic this morning. The people from the cremation service will pick him up and keep his body for us until Saturday, when we can go and be there for his cremation, and receive his ashes.

Even though I knew that all I was giving them was his body, it was still one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, to leave him there. I couldn’t trust my voice to put two words together without having to choke back a sob. Wordlessly, I paid the fees, and literally ran out of there, barely making it back to the car before crumpling in on myself, sobbing and wailing. The depth and pain of my grief is staggering to me, and even if I don’t fully understand it, it’s a testament to the effect he had on my life that I still can’t write these sentences without blinking back tears.

It hasn’t been an easy day. The world goes on, and it makes me angry that people keep living their lives and nothing changes. I still have to work, I still have to meet with clients, and drive, and do my job. And nothing has changed. It hasn’t been an easy day. I’ve managed to keep myself composed in front of clients, only to finally burst into tears again when I get back to my car. I finally have some time alone, and I’m writing this as the only way I know to let my emotions out somehow, to not break down again back here among the computers and cables.

Tonight, I’ll get home, and I’ll sit down, and his cage will be empty, and it won’t be there, and he won’t be there. And I will cry again.

His cremation will be on Saturday. We’re going to be there to see him off, and to receive his ashes, which we will keep in his memory. Maybe it will help, maybe it will provide some closure. Natalie and I both have much to live for, we have each other, we have the rest of the girls who still need us. But now we have a hole again, that we never knew we had until we met him, and that will never really be filled again.

Thank you, little dude. I would give anything for one last moment of looking into your eyes, one last time holding you and watching you scurrying around in my lap and sniffing up at my face and cuddling up against me and begging for attention. You deserved better than this life could ever give you. Thank you for making my life more than it was before you were in it.

I miss you. I always will.

OMFG, Penn Jillette, the “larger, louder half” of Penn & Teller, host of the fuckin’ brilliant show Bullshit over on Showtime, and all-around ass-kicker, has his own radio show! On daily from 2-3PM EST, and, of course, it’s being podcasted as well (copy link target there to get the subscribe link). Color me subscribed!

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Technorati Tags: Penn, Penn & Teller, Bullshit, radio show, podcast

Katharine McPhee

Originally uploaded by Katsushiro.

I will keep my ramblings about my shameful, dirty addiction to American Idol this year to a minimum, but I will take a moment to post about the girl who I’m rooting for: the lovely, talented, and absolutely delicious Miss Katharine McPhee. Go, looky-looky, clicky-clicky, I made a set of her pics.

Natalie and I are both completely taken with her, as she’s a delightful mix of cute, playful, and sexy that just hits all the right spots. Oh, and she can sing, too. Anyway, Katharine, my girlfriend and I have decided that we want to share you. Call me, OK?

Technorati Tags: American Idol, Katharine McPhee