TechgnosisWeb Prime

Recently, there’s been something of a media backlash against the so-called ‘New Atheism’, that is, the vocal declaration of atheism by those who do not subscribe to a religion and who believe that the universe demonstrates that it is very unlikely that there is a god. In addition, ‘new atheists’, or, as they are called by some, ‘fundamentalist atheists’, have stepped up their attack on religion, no longer content with simply keeping their beliefs (or lack thereof) private, but now writing books, putting up blogs, making movies, and generally getting the message out that religion, in all its shapes and forms, is not only illogical, but downright dangerous.

The general response from many in the religious community has been to, as usual, paint themselves as the victims (even though ‘believers’ far outnumber atheists in the US, and atheists are the last minority that it’s still okay to discriminate against), and basically say: “What’s with these uppity atheists all of a sudden? Can’t they just go back to their stuffy rooms and towers and keep quiet like they used to? It’s downright rude of them to start going on about these things, and anyway, everyone knows that they’re wrong.”

Even among atheists themselves, there are those who say “Why do we need to attack religion? Isn’t it enough to simply accept your own lack of belief, and let others believe as they wish? In short, can’t we just live and let live?” It’s a tempting thought. Let’s avoid the confrontation, and just go on with our lives, and if those wacky theists want to go on believing in their big sky fairy, well, good for them. It sounds reasonable, and proper, and the theists would dearly love it if we just all took that point of view and simply want away. But here’s the problem with that: if we go away, they certainly won’t.

There’s a reason that the ‘new’ atheists are loud and proud, and they’re spreading the word, doing everything they can to let the world know that they exist, that they’re out there, and that they’re not alone: the reason is that they’ve noticed that the world we live in has been getting worse and worse, and so much of it can be traced directly back to religion and faith. We live in a world where religious extremists strap bombs to their bodies and kill themselves, taking out dozens of innocents along with them, because they believe they will be rewarded in the afterlife. We live in a world where a large majority of the population of one of the most powerful countries on Earth honestly believes that the Earth is less than 6,000 years old, that evolution is ‘just a theory’, and that scientists are in league with the devil. We live in a world where a large majority of not only the population, but the people in power, the people with their fingers on the proverbial button, believe, honestly believe, that the world will end within their lifetimes, in a terrible war and destruction. And they see this as a good thing, they can’t wait for the Armageddon to come, because they think that their god is going to pull them up into heaven when that moment comes. We live in a world, too, where people routinely trust the advice of a homeopath over a real doctor, where political leaders consult star charts, or base political decisions that will affect millions of people, on the words of a dusty and discredited book written thousands of years ago.

In this situation, I have come to believe that we cannot sit idly by and let it happen. That to simply keep quiet and let religion and ‘believers’ drag this world down into the muck, to let them destroy thousands of innocent others, to continue to spread lies and hurt the poor and gullible, is downright immoral. We, as atheists, are often accused of having no moral compass, simply because we don’t have our commandments handed down to us by and angry and jealous god. That we cannot possibly make moral decisions, as we have no basis on which to form a moral framework. And yet, any fool can see that to simply lay back and do nothing, to let the world fall prey to the poison of religiosity, is not only irresponsible, but simply wrong from a humanistic standpoint. We cannot go quietly. We owe it to ourselves, and to our fellow man, to fight, to shout, to let people know: you’re living a lie. You are being lied to, and you are following that lie to your grave. Religion is a plague upon mankind, and we can move beyond it. And if we annoy a few religious folks, and even a few less bombastic atheists, I can live with that. But let it not be said that we stood by silent while religion continued to drag the world deeper into chaos and ignorance.
(more…)

My New Year’s resolutions for 2007 are on their way, simmering delightfully in the backburner of my subconscious, but in the meantime, I thought I’d bring up, apropos of nothing, a couple of things that warmed the cold, unfeeling, relentlessly rational lump of flesh I call my heart: TV preacher sued over bogus cancer cure claim.

Oh, how I have waited for this day, the day someone would finally gather up the cojones to take one of those snake-oil peddling, sleazy televangelist scumbags to task for taking advantage of those who are gullible and desperate, those who are losing hope and don’t know where else to turn, in short, taking advantage of some of the most helpless members of society (and the fact that the people suing the televangelist are her own family only adds to the deliciousness of the whole affair). The sheer disgust I feel every time one of those bastards tells someone with a terminal disease that they are ‘cured’, is equaled only by my joy in seeing a lawsuit like this put in place. Wrongful death. Suck it, Trebek.

“Oh, but Katsu!,” I hear you thinking already, “What’s wrong with giving these people, people who are dying of cancer and other incurable diseases, some hope? When they go to a Televangelist or a church seeking a cure, and they are told that God loves them and Jesus has cured them, that fills them with hope and strenght to live! Surely you can’t be against that?” Well, folks, I can be, and I am. I’ve got nothing against keeping a positive outlook on our life expectancy even if you’re diagnosed with something terminal. Hell, I think a bit of faith in ‘the doctors will work hard and maybe a cure can be found’ can be quite healthy in keeping your spirits up, as it were, and the will to live and to fight a disease has been shown to provide a clear benefit to many patients. But the problem is that these assholes aren’t simply telling people ‘Have faith and God will give you the strength to see this through.,’ or even ‘Pray and God will surely give the doctors the guidance they need to cure you.’ No, they tell these poor people ‘You’re cured!’ And far, far too many of these people believe it, and stop going to the doctor, stop receiving proper medical attention, and end up worsening their conditions or even shortening their lifespan, for no reason.

And when God inevitably fails to actually provide these so-called cures? It’s never God’s fault, or even the televangelist’s fault, no, it’s always the person’s fault, for not believing enough, for not praying enough, for not being pure enough, for not having pleased God, for not having given enough to the church… the list of excuses is endless, and nauseating. And before you start going on about “Oh, but God does perform miracles and cure all sorts of diseases all the time!,” answer me this: Why are the diseases ‘cured’ always those that aren’t really visible, and are open to interpretation? Why are so many of them ‘pain’ diseases, which have been shown to respond to one’s state of mind or placebo effects? Why are so many those that could have simply been originally misdiagnosed? Why has God never, even once, cured someone with a disfigurement? In short: Why does God hate amputees? He’s never, even once, cured one.

If God wanted to provide some solid proof of his existence, then, damn, growing back a severed limb overnight would be a pretty powerful sign of his power wouldn’t it? Even I would have to step back and go ‘Whoah!’. But, no, not a single recorded case in all of medical history of a human limb spontaneously regenerating, no matter how much prayer, faith, or money the person has given to their God. Is it pure coincidence that every single amputee who’s ever spent night after night praying to God to have their arm/leg/foot/hand/finger/whatever back has never, ever been good enough to receive one of God’s many miracles? Or is it just maybe possible that there are no actual miracles? That every televangelist out there claiming all those cures is simply a liar, a thief, and a parasite upon the suffering of so many people who flock to them out of desperation? Can you think of a single thing more despicable than someone who knowingly lies to people who have lost all hope, not only lies, but takes their money, their faith, their adoration? And then, when the things he or she has promised don’t come to pass, blames the whole damn thing on the other person?

Yeah, I have some pretty strong feelings about those bastards. Fuck ‘em.

Oh, and on a lighter note, I’m at least very, very glad that those of us who are holding out for rationality are at least mostly battling christians, who are, as a whole, generally non-violent. Imagine the battle against Creationism if our opponents were, say, Valhallans (go ahead, click on it to see the whole thing):

RAmen!!!

And while we’re on the theme of IDiots: Scott Sigler’s brilliant podiobook, Ancestor, was attacked yesterday by what looks to be yet another group of IDiots:

We received a long email that said a lot of nasty things, but here is a quote from it to give you an idea of the content:
“You blasphemers are spreading the false scripiture (sic) of evolution, trying to make people think its okay to merge human DNA with animal DNA. Humans are not animals! It is impossible to combine Godly DNA of Man, who was created in God’s image, with the DNA of beasts. God will punish (sic) you. We have destroyed your blog and hopefully your sinful story.”

The letter was signed “ID for God.”

Well, it’s all par for the course: these morons have never been able to tell fact from fiction. Anyway, Scott got his site back up online, but he lost most of his comments. Still, good to know he’s back on track: Episode 16 was released today, and it just keeps getting better and better.. Subscribe today!
(more…)

Technorati Tags: Scott Sigler, podiobook, Ancestor, IDiots

"Breathtaking inanity"

Originally uploaded by cpurrin1.

Found this one on Flickr, an actual screenshot of part of the 139 page decision against Intelligent Design, and now officially my favorite quote from the whole thing.


(more…)

Technorati Tags: Flickr, Intelligent Design, quote

Ahhh… finally, a full night’s rest, and a full day during which I have nothing to do but chill… time to get blogging again! I’m going to be recording and mixing up the next Massively Multiplayer podiobook chapter today, but before I get to that, I really needed to post up about one of those things that happened this week that I just didn’t have time to properly celebrate: the recent decision in the Dover Intelligent Design case. The decision was handed down on the 20th, and it couldn’t have been a more resounding victory for rationality. The judge smacked down the IDiots with 139 pages of asskicking, recognizing and detailing just how absurd the whole ID bullshit is. Not only that, but he blasted the Dover school board for being a bunch of lying, hypocritical, ignorant dolts. We couldn’t have asked for a better outcome.

A selection of some of my favorite quotes from articles and the decision itself follow:

Dover Area School Board members violated the Constitution when they ordered that its biology curriculum must include the notion that life on Earth was produced by an unidentified intelligent cause, U.S. District Judge John E. Jones III said.

Several members repeatedly lied to cover their motives even while professing religious beliefs, he said.

The school board policy, adopted in October 2004, was believed to have been the first of its kind in the nation.

“The citizens of the Dover area were poorly served by the members of the Board who voted for the ID Policy,” Jones wrote.

Oooh, snap!

Moreover, in turning to Defendants’ lead expert, Professor Behe, his testimony at trial indicated that ID is only a scientific, as opposed to a religious, project for him; however, considerable evidence was introduced to refute this claim. Consider, to illustrate, that Professor Behe remarkably and unmistakably claims that the plausibility of the argument for ID depends upon the extent to which one believes in the existence of God. (P-718 at 705) (emphasis added). As no evidence in the record indicates that any other scientific proposition’s validity rests on belief in God, nor is the Court aware of any such scientific propositions, Professor Behe’s assertion constitutes substantial evidence that in his view, as is commensurate with other prominent ID leaders, ID is a religious and not a scientific proposition.

But, wait, I thought ID was science? Oops, guess not! Score another one for the good guys!

The immune system is the third system to which Professor Behe has applied the definition of irreducible complexity. Although in Darwin’s Black Box, Professor Behe wrote that not only were there no natural explanations for the immune system at the time, but that natural explanations were impossible regarding its origin. (P-647 at 139; 2:26-27 (Miller)). However, Dr. Miller presented peer-reviewed studies refuting Professor Behe’s claim that the immune system was irreducibly complex. Between 1996 and 2002, various studies confirmed each element of the evolutionary hypothesis explaining the origin of the immune system. (2:31 (Miller)). In fact, on cross-examination, Professor Behe was questioned concerning his 1996 claim that science would never find an evolutionary explanation for the immune system. He was presented with fiftyeight peer-reviewed publications, nine books, and several immunology textbook chapters about the evolution of the immune system; however, he simply insisted that this was still not sufficient evidence of evolution, and that it was not “good enough.” (23:19 (Behe).

Mm-hmm.. right. So, ID is science because it.. completely ignores any evidence presented that contradicts it? Everything that the IDiots keep claiming is proof of ‘design’, as also being actively investigated and tested by real scientists, and, without fail, natural explanations are always found, and the theory of evolution is strenghtened. Meanwhile, not a single facet of ID has been studied and shown to prove the tenets of ID (mainly because ID, like any other bit of religious claptrap, cannot be proven or disproven, it’s a matter of faith!). The only way IDiots can live with themselves and continue to hold forth on ID is by ignoring or discounting the mountains of evidence that consistently and continually disprove their bogus claims about ‘irreducible complexity’.

Ahh.. this is the best Agnostica ever. On a related note, I gave most of my friends some FSM bumper stickers in celebration of Agnostica at the recent party, and I’ve still got several stickers left. Let me know if you want one, I’ll get them or mail them to you and you just might get ‘em in time for Three Kings Day.
(more…)

Technorati Tags: podiobook, Intelligent Design, rationality, Behe, ID, evolution, Agnostica, FSM

Hey folks.. Thanksgiving’s come and gone and I’ve been remiss in wishing everyone a happy holiday season, so, here goes: It’s December 14th, QM Day, and that means that the best time of the year is here! Happy Agnostica! I’m just gonna bypass the whole so-called “War on Christmas” that the fundies are fuming about this year, and focus on the one winter holiday I’m big on. So, brew up some Glögi, start filling up the Random Bag of Fun, deck the halls with Mobius Chains and Schrodinger Boxes, and enjoy the season, folks.
(more…)

After my little thanksgiving speech, I received a couple of comments, and one of them, from my friend, Jose, stated that he wished I wouldn’t slam religion so much. I started composing a reply, and halfway through it I realized that this is something that I haven’t talked completely about on this blog before, and maybe it’s something I should share with everyone, if only so that you can understand a little better where I’m coming from and why I’ve come to the point of view I now hold.

Now, if your religious beliefs give you strenght and comfort, then that’s great, for you, and I’m actually happy for you. But in my life, religion has been almost universally a negative force. Religious differences tore my family apart in many ways, and I’m not just talking about my own teenage rebellion against the ‘Fuente de Agua Viva’ folks. My mother and my grandparents barely spoke for years over the fact that they were catholic and my mom was an evangelical. Then, later on, those same grandparents drifted apart to the point where they barely spoke to each other over the fact that my grandfather became obsessed with the ‘Virgen del Pozo’ thing, to the point where he became one of those crazy old coots that stands out in the town square with a bullhorn telling us all how we must repent or die.

Meanwhile, my mom’s religious fundamentalist beliefs led her to basically have 3 ‘exorcisms’ performed on me, simply because I did not agree with her beliefs. These were not pleasant, and, frankly, could be considered child abuse. I was physically restrained, pushed down, shouted at from inches away, terrorized, threatened, and all but beaten by these ‘holy’ people, not once, but on three different occasions. This caused me to basically want to leave the house and the island as soon as I possibly could, and probably changed the course of my life for the worse, as I made many decisions soon after turning 18 that were based solely on the desire to stay away from these people. I’m still paying for the results of some of those decisions today.

On my father’s side, he had become estranged with his own parents soon after marrying my mom, also for religious reasons. My grandparents on my father’s side are Mita, and my mother was a catholic at the time. My father converted to catholicism for her, which caused a rift between him and his parents that took many years to begin to heal. Years later, and one of the main reasons for the divorce was my mother’s conversion to evangelical christianity, while my father remained a catholic. After the divorce, he sought comfort in the church that he had dedicated over 15 years to, only to be told that he was now persona non-grata because of his divorced status: no communion, the highest sacrament of the catholic church, for him. This caused him a lot of pain, and he pulled away from the church.. but seeking other beleifs to cling to. Unfortunately, he fell straight into a lot of New Age bull, and lost quite a bit of money on ‘psychics’, ‘aura readers’. and other sorts of crap. It wasn’t until he took me once to an ‘aura reader’ and the guy told him that I had a ’special purple aura’ and was destined to be a ‘great spiritual leader’, and that he would take me under his wing and train me for only several thousand dollars a month, that he started to realize that it’s all one big scam. By then, though, a lot of damage had been done. These days, his point of view is closer to mine, though where I am an atheist, he’s more of an agnostic.

There are more examples, but I think you get the main gist of it. At least in my life, and in my family, religion and religious differences have been pretty much a completely negative force. And for some years, this was a serious problem for me: I had been raised to beleive that religion was neccesary to be ‘complete’, but every religion I had been exposed to was negative.. and as I tried to find other alternative religions to cling to, I found that they were all pretty much the same thing in that sense. And that is why I am grateful to have discovered, after years of searching, that I don’t need religion or superstition or belief in anything supernatural to be happy. Life itself, the world around me, the people I share my life with, the things I do, for myself and for others, all that is enough. I can live a complete and happy life without the attachment, dogma, irrationality and intolerance that religion breeds. And, to me, this is something to celebrate and be grateful and happy for.
(more…)

Hey there, ladies and gents. Just thought I’d drop on by and wish everyone a happy Turkey Day. Every year, we gather together, and in remembrance of that sacred time when the Pilgrims, deciding that they had gotten tired of being religiously persecuted, set off for the New World, so they could do some hardcore persecutin’ of their own. It was a grand ol’ time, and the Native Americans will probably never forget all the fun that was had as they were raped, looted, killed, infected with diseases, and swindled out of their land by those rascally Pilgrims.

So let’s all get together, as a family, and celebrate this grand tradition by doing what America does better than anyone else: gorge ourselves on food until we pass out. Hooray!

… and yes, I am thankful and appreciative for stuff today. I appreciate that I have a life that I’m happy with. I’m thankful to my friends, for being so good, and I’m thankful to my family, because they’ve mellowed out enough that I can at least tolerate them. I’m thankful to my girlfriend, for loving me and putting up with my idiosyncracies, and I’m apprciative that I’m healthy. I appreciate that I live in a fascinating time, and I appreciate that I live in a country where I am allowed to voice my opinions freely, even when (or especially when) those opinions go against what our ‘leaders’ tell us. I’m thankful for the work of people like Carl Sagan, Michael Shermer, and the Amazing Randi, who have helped me see and understand that you don’t need superstition and religion to live a full, happy, meaningful life, and that the universe around us is so much more fascinating when you look at it with a clear mind. And, finally, I’m thankful to my readers, all those silent people who I see coming in day in and day out on my logs, even thought they don’t comment, it helps to know someone’s out there, listening, and probably shaking his or her head repreachfully.
(more…)

We all know he’s a liar, a hypocrit, and a violent, depraved individual who advocates murder, opression, and intolerance worldwide. But now we have proof that he’s also a Satanist!

That’s right.. ’cause Jebus is fuckin’ METAL.
(more…)

As the X-mas season approaches, bringing joy, good will, and crass consumerism to all good boys and girls, I want this to be the image that shapes and informs your every holiday thought:

Happy Holidays!

Well, at least we’re making some progress. News just came in that 8 out of 9 members of the Dover Board of Education, all of them proponents of so-called Intelligent Design (a.k.a. the poor man’s Creationism), have been replaced with new members who support the teaching of actual science in science class. Not only that, but the dumbass astrologer that actually sued NASA for ‘messing up her horoscopes’ when they slammed the Deep Impact probe into a comet, had her case summarily thrown out of court.

Unfortunately, not even these points of brilliance affect the dense cloud of idiocy that covers Kansas: the Kansas Board of Education approved science standards for public schools Tuesday that cast doubt on the theory of evolution. Apparently they want ‘disclaimers’ placed on books and said before class that point out that Evolution is ‘only’ a theory and that they should consider other options, such as the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
(more…)

While the debate on my previous entry continues, I’m gonna go ahead and poke the hornet’s nest a little more by pointing out this particularly scary poll I ran into:

51 percent of Americans say God created humans in their present form, and another three in 10 say that while humans evolved, God guided the process. Just 15 percent say humans evolved, and that God was not involved.

CBS News | Poll: Majority Reject Evolution | October 24, 2005 11:30:08

So, while there’s a 4% margin of error each way in the poll, it’s still downright scary. 51% of the population of the country completely rejects evolution, despite the mountains of evidence, despite its explanatory power as a scientific theory, despite the fact that the alternative they offer is that some invisible being in the sky waved his hands and created us. Hooray.

Americans most likely to believe in only evolution are liberals (36 percent), those who rarely or never attend religious services (25 percent), and those with a college degree or higher (24 percent).

White evangelicals (77 percent), weekly churchgoers (74 percent) and conservatives (64 percent), are mostly likely to say God created humans in their present form.

CBS News | Poll: Majority Reject Evolution | October 24, 2005 11:30:08

Just stuff to think about while tossing back and forth in bed, trying not to quake with fear.

(more…)

My point of view on religion is pretty clear: I’m an atheist, and I have some fairly strong feelings against organized religion, especially the people who lead organized religious cults, as well as the more ardent followers. However, due to my personal history, it’s easy to discount my point of view as simple ’sour grapes’. What’s not so easy to discount, however, is independent scientific study.

A recent study on religion and society, titled: Cross-National Correlations of Quantifiable Societal Health
with Popular Religiosity and Secularism in the Prosperous
Democracies, claims a strong correlation between influence from major organized religions on society and an increase in the rate of homicide, STD’s, teen pregnancy, etc.

Here’s a few short quotes from a commentary on the study:

“… To summarize it, a study in the Journal of Religion and Society compared religious belief in eighteen democracies (measured by how many of its citizens express absolute belief in God, how often they pray, and how often they attend church, etc.) with indicators of how well those societies function (as measured by rates of homicide, sexually transmitted disease, teen pregnancy, abortion, child mortality, etc.).

The researcher, Gregory S. Paul, found a striking correlation, that the most religious democracies exhibited substantially higher degrees of social dysfunction than societies with larger percentages of atheists and agnostics.

And the good old United States is the outlier in both categories, the US “which has by far the largest percentage of people who take the Bible literally and express absolute belief in God (and the lowest percentage of atheists and agnostics) – also has by far the highest levels of homicide, abortion, teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.”

…

But the study does seem to thoroughly debunk the widely-held and often-repeated notion that religion is necessary for a good society. In paragraphs 3 through 8 of the study, Paul refers to a number of political figures, from Joe Lieberman to Pope Benedict XVI to Tom DeLay, all of them singing the same tune: that belief in God is the prerequisite for a civil society. Paul shows that notion is utterly, provably false.

Why the Pope would promote religion is obvious. Whether Lieberman and DeLay are simply pandering to their audience, or trying to actively preserve a voting bloc that will respond to authority rather than reason, I’m not qualified to say.”

Now, there’s a whole bunch of criticisms that have been leveled at the report, so let’s hit those quickly before the fundamentalist apologists show up:

• The author of the study is dinosaur paleontologist rather than a sociologist: a fair criticism, but easily factored out by examining his methodology rather than his resume
• The study does not explain the correlation: of course not, and it never set out to do that. The study simply shows that a correlation exists.

Let’s talk, instead, about what we do see in the study: there’s a correlation between religiousness and social dysfunction. What does this mean? It could mean any one of a number of things:

• Religion causes homicide, STD’s, abortion, and child mortality. (I know, I know, but bear with me here)
• That people who experience this sort of thing tend to turn to religion more often than those who do not.
• That there is a separate, common cause that underlies both rising violence and religious impulses.

Any one of these things, or several others, is possible. The point is, we don’t quite know yet. But what this study does show is that there’s something here that definitely deserves further study. To dismiss it out of hand, as many religious-based organizations have done, or to refuse to talk about it and study it further because it skirts dangerouly close to the usual ‘taboo’ subjects around religious influence on society, is a mistake.

And now, let the hate mail come. Unlike the author of the commentary linked to above, I always ‘relish the hateful mail and other retaliation I might receive from those loving, gentle people who model themselves after Christ.’
(more…)

Derek, along with Swoopy, is the host of the incredibly popular podcast, Skepticality, which I’ve been listening to since it started, and which I love. It is easily one of the best, smartest, and most entertaining programs out there, and Derek is one of my personal heroes.

Last night, Derek suffered a VMA, a brain-aneurysm-type event which has landed him in the hospital, under heavy sedation, pretty much comatose, and on a respirator. He was lucky: if he had not been among friends and family when he first started to feel weak and headachy, he may well have died in his sleep. He is currently in the hospital, in critical condition, and the doctors say he is likely to remain so for weeks. It is still too early to know what will happen. Here’s what Swoopy posted up over on their forums:

Per the short podcast I posted a moment ago,

Derek is in intensive care suffering from a bleed to his brain (or a AVM), and is expected to be there for the next several weeks. We don’t know when he’ll be conscious. He is at this time on a ventilator and heavily sedated. His condition is critical.

Thank you for supporting us, we’re certainly not giving up. But until we know more his wife, his parents, and I are spending this time with him.

It’s very late, and this was very sudden. I’ll check back when I can.

- Swoopy
_________________
Derek Colanduno
host - skepticality
I somewhat run this place, when Swoopy isn’t here…

Listen to Swoopy’s anouncement here, too.

To Derek, his wife, Susan, his co-host Swoopy, and their friends and family, I just want you all know that Derek is in my thoughts and that I am cheering for him to recover, continue his life, continue the show, and continue to be an inspiration to so many of us out there. As I said before, this man is one of my personal heroes, and I want only the best for him. You’ve got at least one guy down here in Puerto Rico rooting for you, and I know that many, many more of us out there are sending you our best hopes. I look forward eagerly to you being able to read these words yourself as well. Continue being strong, we’re all here for you.

when Pastamania runs wild on you?!

And now we know that even the Hulkster has been Touched by His Noodly Appendage! Long Live the Flying Spaghetti Monster, Arrrrrr!!!

… I swear, I’m going to photoshop a pirate hat and an eyepatch on him before this day is over.

UPDATE: Because I promised you a pirate… Yarrrrrr!

So, the Kansas Board of Education (there’s a fucking oxymoron for ya) voted 6-4 today to open the doors to ‘Intelligent Design’ to be taught as an alternative theory, in science class, for all state schools…

I’ve said what I was going to say about this idiocy before, but I do need to add one thing: the correct response to this is for all out-of-state universities to consider a high school diploma from a Kansas school as less valid. And before someone comes up and says that I need to learn to respect and be tolerant of alternative viewpoints: I’m fucking tired of being tolerant and accepting of alternate viewpoints that are completely idiotic.

Fuck the Creationists, and fuck the South.

And because I just need something lighter after the previous entry, may I present an alternate theory to Intelligent Design and evolution: the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

I am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for students to hear multiple viewpoints so they can choose for themselves the theory that makes the most sense to them. I am concerned, however, that students will only hear one theory of Intelligent Design.

Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.

It is for this reason that I’m writing you today, to formally request that this alternative theory be taught in your schools, along with the other two theories. In fact, I will go so far as to say, if you do not agree to do this, we will be forced to proceed with legal action. I’m sure you see where we are coming from. If the Intelligent Design theory is not based on faith, but instead another scientific theory, as is claimed, then you must also allow our theory to be taught, as it is also based on science, not on faith.

There is more, much more, and it is all brilliant. Also:

Hell, they’ve even got a Wikipedia entry, so it must be true!

Sorry it’s been a couple of days since my last post. This news had me down for the count with a bad case of despair and hopelessness for my fellow man:

President Bush invigorated proponents of teaching alternatives to evolution in public schools with remarks saying that schoolchildren should be taught about “intelligent design,” a view of creation that challenges established scientific thinking and promotes the idea that an unseen force is behind the development of humanity.

Although he said that curriculum decisions should be made by school districts rather than the federal government, Bush told Texas newspaper reporters in a group interview at the White House on Monday that he believes that intelligent design should be taught alongside evolution as competing theories.

“Both sides ought to be properly taught . . . so people can understand what the debate is about,” he said, according to an official transcript of the session. Bush added: “Part of education is to expose people to different schools of thought. . . . You’re asking me whether or not people ought to be exposed to different ideas, and the answer is yes.”

(Via the Washington Post)

I’m just… flabbergasted.

I really can’t say anything, without feeling my head explode. Instead, I’ll point you to someone who eviscerates this with a ton more talent than I could ever muster up: The Kung-Fu Monkey.

I just want to add one thing to the fuckin’ brilliant rant over at the Monkey’s site: part of the reason that this is so galling is that, not only is so-called Intelligent Design completely baseless and worthless as a theory and not based in any sort of science, but the very concept of teaching it as an alternative and presenting it as ‘the other side of the debate’ is completely fallacious: there is no debate. No serious scientist even considers, for a second, that ID could be a valid conteder to evolution. Let me say it again: there is no debate in the scientific community as to wether ID is a valid contender to evolution. None at all. And teaching children that there is, is a complete lie. Case fucking closed.

So, if you have tuned into a TV, read a magazine, or interacted with other human beings in the past couple of months, you’ve probably seen Tom Cruise’s antics as he shills for the dangerous cult known as Scientology. At first, his claims were sort of amusing, slightly ditrubing, but amusing. But lately he’s been getting more and more serious, and when you see his interviews, you can tell that this is a man on the edge of losing control, spreading lies, misinformation, and plain old B.S. in his desperate attempts to please his superiors in Scientology.

After his latest attacks on drug rehabilitation programs, and his obvious lies, however, I have decided that I need to take some form of basic action. So, I’m officially boycotting Tom Cruise. I will not see any movie with him in it, I will not see any movie where he is involved, and I will avoid all other entertainment products that he may be involved with. Not that I really needed much of an excuse to avoid his shoddy acting in the first place, but there you go.

Here’s the text that really pissed me off enough to write about this, excerpted from Randi’s latest JREF newsletter:

CRUISING BACK

Reader Jacob Fortin reports:

As you are well aware, if you’ve had enough time to read the news, watch a bit of T.V. or looked out your window, no doubt you’ve noticed the strange and frightening behavior of one Tom Cruise in his endless pursuit to further the goals of Scientology. Most recently, in an interview with Der Spiegel, a German magazine, the actor claimed that Scientology had the most successful drug rehabilitation program on the planet. Luckily, the host pointed out that no, this was not true, and casually put Mr. Cruise in his place.

What has truly become frightening is the sheer amount of misinformation that Mr. Cruise has begun spreading, particularly his attack on psychiatry. In one interview, he claimed that Ritalin had become a street drug, and that Methadone had originally been called Adolphomine. He also accused Carl Jung of being an editor for a Nazi magazine. All of these are false. They are based on either myth (as the Carl Jung shtick) or downright confusion (Methadone was originally called Dolophine, “dolor” being Latin for pain).

Other profoundly frightening testimonials on Scientology’s drug rehabilitation, crime prevention, and even literacy program do more than raise the alert status to orange. These programs are the first step in many to indoctrinate individuals towards their bogus “religion.” That any beneficial results occur is secondary to the much more frightening prospects of people being duped into a pyramid scheme cult.

Psychiatry, like any science, is interested in finding out the truth about how the mind works. Though it is imperfect, it has never claimed to possess all the answers, and any abuses in this field are a result of personal negligence on the part of the practitioners, not of the field itself. Mr. Tom Cruise lambastes psychiatry because of its use of drugs such as Ritalin or even Prozac. He claims that chemical imbalances are not real, but rather can be cured by vitamins. These claims are obviously the work of a pseudo-scientist quack, which, not surprisingly, came from a science fiction author. If vitamins offer a cure, then I might suggest that Scientology put itself even more in the limelight by proving to the JREF that chemical imbalances can be cured through their bogus programs. I’m sure that they would put the million dollars to a “good cause.”

Jacob, it seems evident that Tom Cruise is being pressured by the honchos of the Church of Scientology to use his very high profile to sell their science-fiction religion to the young film audiences, and we’ve seen him hang up his career and allow everyone to toss rocks at it. His choice….

Part of that interview:

DER SPIEGEL: Do you see it as your job to recruit new followers for Scientology?

Tom Cruise: I’m a helper. For instance, I myself have helped hundreds of people get off drugs. In Scientology, we have the only successful drug rehabilitation program in the world. It’s called Narconon.

DER SPIEGEL: That’s not correct. Yours is never mentioned among the recognized detox programs. Independent experts warn against it because it is rooted in pseudoscience.

Tom Cruise: You don’t understand what I am saying. It’s a statistically proven fact that there is only one successful drug rehabilitation program in the world. Period.

DER SPIEGEL: With all due respect, we doubt that. Mr. Cruise, you made studio executives, for example from Paramount, tour Scientology’s “Celebrity Center” in Hollywood. Are you trying to extend Scientology’s influence in Hollywood?

Tom Cruise: I just want to help people. I want everyone to do well.

Regarding that interview, reader Hogne B. Pettersen wrote:

Last week I got a call from a friend of mine who has been working with drug addicts and rehabilitation programs for over a decade. He was furious and told me that he would follow my example and never watch a Tom Cruise film again. I quote:

This actor is sitting there claiming that all the work that I and thousands of people all over the world have done, and are doing every day, has been unsuccessful. Personally I’ve saved hundreds of lives. Several times a week I’m thanked by people for saving them. And this nutcase is sitting there claiming that all our documented results are lies? The Scientologists have never presented one single result of their program! Never!

He was so angry that he was on the verge of crying, and I can’t say that I blame him. I find it very disrespectful of Tom Cruise to say things like that, but I guess a world where political correctness forces you to say “I’m sorry” all the time, gives him the right to do it.